When the New Year comes around, it’s a widespread tradition for people to make a list of things they want to change about themselves and their lifestyles in the upcoming year. This can be a good jumping off point for people to make important improvements, but unfortunately there are many problems with the ways that American culture encourages self-improvement, especially for women, that can really dirty the charm of New Year’s Resolutions. Some of the most popular resolutions are different permutations of “exercise more” and “eat healthier”, many times with the underlying goal to “get a better body”. Women in American culture have been taught to judge their own and other women’s bodies and idealize and strive for perfection, and this is made much worse with the easy and increased access to social media through new technologies. Whether it is 100 pounds of bone, toned and flat, or toned with curves, self-improvement for many women is tied to attaining a certain body.
It’s unhealthy to tell women the most important or only thing they should focus on improving in their lives is how they look. Weight and waist size are not tied to happiness, and we should be focusing on things in our life that are. Women are also being told to try to attain looks that are physically impossible for most of their bodies. Instagram models show off tiny, toned waists the same size as my thigh, and toned thighs as big as my calf. Even if that is how that model looks in real life, those measurements are not possible on me unless you take a few of my ribs out, starve me, give me liposuction, and force me to do toning exercises for a few hours a day. But honestly, she probably doesn’t look exactly like that in real life. She has definitely thought through lighting and angles, has probably not eaten at all or much that day, and/or has photoshopped her body in some way in the picture. The easy access to social media through technology has increased this obsession with our own and other women’s bodies, and led to a lot of judgment of ourselves and others.
Although the type of body that is obsessed over changes slightly over the years and varies for each person, there is always an idealized “perfect” woman’s body that is obsessed over. Society has begun to talk about this issue more. Many clothing brands are embracing all body types when creating their clothing and marketing it, but we’re still not talking about it enough. Many girls and women are still wrapped up in unhealthy behaviors and are obsessing over pictures of models in magazines, on the Internet, and especially on social media sites like Instagram.
And there are serious consequences to this focus on physical self-improvement towards this ideal. Since the 1960s, eating disorder rates have doubled and have been increasing in very young children as young as seven years old. Also, “‘Forty percent of 9-year-old girls have dieted and even 5 year-olds are concerned about diet’”. That is absolutely insane! Studies have shown that exposure to the “thin ideal” in mass media leads to “body dissatisfaction, internalization of the thin ideal, and disordered eating among women”. In 2010, 69% of American elementary girls who read magazines said that the pictures influenced their idea of the ideal body shape, and 47% said the pictures made them want to lose weight. Instagram use has been linked to increased symptoms of a more recently identified eating disorder called “orthorexia nervosa” which is an obsession with eating healthily, which, unsurprisingly, is often comorbid with anorexia nervosa.
I have a long history with American society’s idea of female “self-improvement”. I developed anorexia and bulimia in middle school alongside depression. I was obsessed with pictures of bony, thin girls on Tumblr. I counted calories, I didn’t eat enough, and I exercised too much.
It took a lot of energy to keep it all going. A lot of energy I could have spent drawing or trying a new sport or reading. The funny thing is that I thought I was working on making the perfect me. I thought I was improving myself. I initially got treatment in high school and got to a healthy weight but the mental side has been a lifetime struggle. There’s still a tiny bit in the back of my brain that thinks that if I just lost a few pounds maybe I’d be happier with myself and with life. But that’s just not true.
Self-improvement does not need to be focused on attaining a certain body shape or weight, and should not be resulting in an obsession. Instead, we should be working on improving ourselves as people, achieving a healthy routine and lifestyle that works for us, and focusing on acceptance of our bodies. This can come in many forms! For me, I strive to work on who I am as a person and realize that my weight and body measurements are not related to that at all. I strive to eat semi-healthy, so that I feel good about what I’m putting into my body but I’m not stopping myself from indulging. And most of all, I strive to accept my body and love it for what it is. I focus less on what I look like and more of what my body can do. I focus on how my body is performing on runs rather than how much I weigh or how big my stomach is. For other people this might look very different. Start with taking some time to think about who you are and what your life is like right now, and identify some realistic things you’d like to change to make yourself happier. Maybe you want to work on listening to others more, being calmer and less reactive, standing up for yourself more, being more honest, being true to yourself, or maybe you’re completely happy with who you are (I envy you)! Make any lifestyle changes that will improve your life. Maybe you want to meditate once every day, take time to read, kick a toxic person out of your life, do some collaging, eat more cantaloupe, bake more desserts and cakes, run every other day, watch more volleyball, do more strength training exercises, pet your cat more, do yoga in the morning, or start journaling (I highly suggest this). The list goes on and on of ways available to you to work on yourself and achieve a happy and healthy lifestyle. But one of the most important things in this equation is to work on accepting yourself and your body. Along with finding a healthy balance in your life, acceptance of your body and who you are is very important. Many things are definitely changeable in ourselves and in our lives, but sometimes we just need to accept who we are and empower ourselves through this acceptance!